The Gentle Sleep Coaching Process

sleep coaching

From Good Night, Sleep Tight: As a loving and responsible parent, I believe we have five essential obligations to our children. We need to take care of their emotional health and their physical health. We need to give them good nutrition and a good education. And we need to make sure they know how to sleep. It’s that simple and it’s important. Sleep coaching (sometimes called sleep training) is nothing more than helping your baby learn to put himself to sleep so that he can successfully nap and (eventually) sleep through the night. Many parents don’t realize that babies do not inherently know how to fall asleep; sleep is a learned skill. When you bring home your infant, you lull them to sleep with just about every activity, since most newborns spend their time either eating, sleeping, or getting his diaper changed; infants sleep much of the day, as they should. Once your child reaches six months of age, her sleep patterns change, and you’ll notice that she is waking for longer periods, and sleep may become a struggle. The good news? Sleep coaching can help! Now, I realize that the phrase ‘sleep training’ causes some parents to shy away from the idea because they automatically think of their baby... more

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Baby Sleep Problem: My Child Wakes Up 20 Minutes After Falling Asleep at Bedtime

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Would you like to have me answer your sleep question in my next baby sleep problem video? If so, scroll down and submit your question in the comment section below. I will pick several questions a month to answer and post them here on the blog! If you would rather read than watch my above video then here is the transcript of this week's baby sleep problem video: Hi, Kim West, the Sleep Lady and in this video, I’m going to answer this mom’s question. She wrote in: “My 8-month old is sleeping beautifully thanks to your program except that every night after she goes to bed, my child wakes up after exactly one half an hour and cries for at least 20 minutes. She goes to bed at 7:30pm but even when we try a different bedtime, she’s waking up. She sleeps through the night for 11 hours and takes one or two naps, for an hour and a half to 2 hours during the day. We followed your plan and it’s worked for us. She’s sleeping finally. We thought she was teething but it’s been since she was 4 or 5 months old and she’s been doing this no matter what we do. Is this just a baby sleep problem that she’ll grow out of or has it become a habit? And if it’s a habit, how do we break it?” That is interesting,... more

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Sleep Regression: Just a Phase?

sleep regression

We’ve all been there. Baby has been peacefully sleeping through the night, and, consequently, so is everyone else (Hooray!). And then, out of the blue, your sweet baby is up at all hours, wanting to be soothed, fed, and crying. So what happened? Many refer to these short episodes as a Sleep Regression. What is Sleep Regression? So what is a sleep regression? The term ‘sleep regression’ is used to describe the periods of time when your baby who otherwise slept through the night suddenly begins to have uncharacteristically frequent night wakings, and may even have napping issues. Sleep regressions usually last anywhere from two to six weeks, and then your baby’s sleep patterns return to normal as suddenly as they changed. Dr. T. Berry Brazelton suggests that we may see regressions, or a period of disorganization not just in sleep, but in social, emotional, and feeding patterns as well. When will a sleep regression occur? Danish researchers Vanderijt and Plooij published a book, “The Wonder Weeks,” entirely about these periods of regressions and growth. According to their research, growth spurts occur at weeks 5, 8, 12, 19, 26, 37, 46, and 55. That’s a lot of growth spurts! Babies may experience... more

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Pre-Toddler Sleep Regression

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I’m not going to claim that all babies experience a sleep regression (or two), but most do. And if there is one sleep regression period that seems to be abundantly common, it’s when babies learn to crawl and/or pull themselves to a standing position. This is a huge step in their gross motor development, and opens an entirely unexplored world. Of course they don’t want to sleep (and therefore, parents experience some very common baby sleep problems)! The Crawling Sleep Regression Most babies learn to crawl sometime between eight and ten months, which quite naturally produces another sleep regression for your child. They have mobility! There is so much exploring to do! And sleep? It’s the absolutely last thing on your baby’s list of priorities. Often, this sleep regression sneaks up on parents, since every baby learns to crawl at a different age. And, if you’ve experienced the 4 month sleep regression, you may not feel fully recovered (after all, that was just a few months ago!). And, unlike the 4 month sleep regression, which occurred because your baby was fundamentally changing how she slept, this sleep regression is caused by a huge leap in your baby’s brain development. I’ve mentioned The Wonder... more

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Can Sleep Issues Be Mistaken For ADHD?

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There is more and more research being done regarding the potential link between Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder and children’s sleep issues. It’s well documented that we are all getting less sleep than we used to. In fact the amount of people who are getting less than seven hours of sleep each night has increased by over 30% since 1960. That’s a huge increase! And for children, a lack of sleep, coupled by rigorous daily schedules may be contributing factors to what may be sleep deprivation, instead of ADHD. In fact, I find that many parents aren’t sure exactly how much sleep their children actually need (hint: it’s more than you think!). In a recent article for the New York Times, Vatsal G. Thakkar, a clinical assistant professor of psychiatry at the N.Y.U. School of Medicine, posed an interesting question: Are we confusing ADHD with sleep deprivation? As a society, we are living in a world where ADHD is becoming the common solution for children who bounce off the walls, act out, or exhibit other behaviors that may seem extreme. In fact, Thakkar points out that “It might just be a coincidence, but this sleep-restricting lifestyle began getting more extreme in the 1990s, the decade with the... more

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5 Reasons That A Sleep Coach is Better Than Any Sleep Book

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Yesterday, I ran across an article in the Huffington Post entitled “I Read All The Baby Sleep Books”. In the article the author (a mother) is seemingly overwhelmed by the wealth of (mis)information available to parents who just want one thing: a baby who sleeps through the night. The article points out that every sleep book seems to have a different opinion about how to help your baby sleep: Cry it out. Don’t let your baby cry. Keep a log. Don’t worry about it. Your baby needs to be held constantly. Don't rock your baby. The advice literally goes on and on. All of that information can be confusing (not to mention completely overwhelming)! As a new parent, you don't know who or what to believe. To make matters worse, how are you supposed to know which method will work because every child is different? And what about the books that provide bad information? Usually when parents turn to sleep books it’s because they have a baby who is not sleeping, and everyone is already exhausted. So they get online (or drive to the local bookstore), and stare at the myriad of books that promise to help their baby learn to sleep. The problem is in the amount of information. So what’s an exhausted, desperate parent’s best... more

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Baby Sleep Problem: My Husband and I Don’t Agree and Can’t Be Consistent

Toddler Sleep Problem

Would you like to have me answer your baby sleep problem in my next video? If so, scroll down and submit your question in the comment section below. I will pick several questions a month to answer and post them here on the blog! If you would rather read than watch my above video then here is the transcript of this week's baby sleep problem video: Hi, Kim West, the Sleep Lady and today, I’m going to answer this mom’s question. This is what she wrote in: “My life has become a battleground between my son, my husband and myself, and I feel like I’m in a total loss. We have your book. We’ve read it and we have some challenges. I admit to not being very consistent at the night time awakenings and bedtime in terms of allowing my 8-month old son to fall asleep on his own as he immediately becomes hysterical to the point of choking, coughing and spattering, and he does this both with myself and my husband. However, my husband just sits there and does nothing to console him while he wails. Any help or advice you can offer would be amazing and anything you can offer to help my husband see that he can’t just sit there would be helpful. Also, my son is a poor napper and I feel we should be focusing on bedtime... more

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Baby Sleep Problem: My Two Children Now Share a Room and Aren’t Sleeping

Sleep Lady Help! Baby Sleep Problem

Would you like to have me answer your sleep question in my next video? If so, scroll down and submit your question in the comment section below. I will pick several questions a month to answer and post them here on the blog! If you would rather read than watch my above video then here is the transcript of this week's video: Hi, Kim West, The Sleep Lady and today, I’m going to answer Danielle’s baby sleep problem. She e-mailed in this story. “I currently live in Japan and I have two and a half and a 7-month old. Before my 7-month old son was born, my daughter was sleeping well and able to put herself to sleep. After his birth, she had great difficulty getting to sleep on her own. Then two months later, we moved in with friends for two weeks, went to a 5-week missionary training in Colorado in which we all shared one room. We stayed with friends again for a week and then moved back to Japan where we initially slept in one room and she could see us. Now, we’re using all of our 2-bedroom apartment and we’re attempting to have the two children sleep in the same room. My daughter repeatedly cries, throws a fit or takes two hours to get herself to sleep at night. She’s also begun waking during the night and... more

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Toddler and Baby Sleep Problems: 4 Common Causes of Early Rising- video

Baby Sleep Problems-4 Common Causes of Early Rising

Would you like to have me answer your baby sleep problem in my next video? If so, scroll down and submit your question in the comment section below. I will pick several questions a month to answer and post them here on the blog! If you would rather read than watch my above video then here is the transcript of this week's toddler and baby sleep problem video: Hi! Kim West, The Sleep Lady. Today, I’m going to answer an email from a parent who only left their initial, "T." It says: “Hello! My 20-month-old is an okay sleeper, but he continues to wake up very early between 4:30 and 5:30 in the morning. He’ll only sleep about ten hours per night. Because he wakes up so early, he needs his nap at around 11:00 a.m. but he usually sleeps for three hours.” “I thought I once heard that if I push back the nap to 12:00 and continue to put him to bed at 7:00 or 7:30, he may sleep later. Is this true? We’re going to give it a try but I thought I’d ask your opinion. He is such an early riser and it’s tough. He is much more cranky than the random mornings when he does manage to sleep until 6:00. We welcome your advice and help with this sleep problem.” Early rising is one of the most common topics in my... more

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Helping Your Baby Sleep Even When They Have Reflux (GERD)

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Before I discuss how to help babies with reflux (GERD) sleep better, I would like to reference the 7 signs of reflux as discussed in more detail in the book Colic Solved: The Essential Guide to Infant Reflux and the Care of Your Crying, Difficult-to- Soothe Baby by Bryan Vartabedian, MD (which is a very informative, helpful book). The presence of one or more of the following signs may suggest that your baby is suffering with GERD: 1. Spitting and vomitting 2. Constant hiccups 3. Feeding disturbances 4. Chronic irritability 5. Discomfort when lying on the back 6. Sleep disturbance 7. Chronic cough and/or congestion" ***If your baby has any of these signs, please discuss this with your pediatrician before trying to address any sleep problems. Reflux can cause night wakenings, discomfort when lying down and shortened naps. How To Help A Baby Sleep Who Has Reflux (that is being treated) As parents, our natural instinct is to soothe a baby who hurts. That’s exactly what we should do. But we need to pay attention to how we soothe a baby who has reflux. While a baby without tummy problems may learn to rock himself to sleep for example, a reflux baby dealing with projectile vomiting may miss out on the chance... more

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